Tuesday, December 11, 2007

On life and death...

....some of you know my story....
....some of you don't.... that's okay.

For those of you who don't, I'll give you a brief portion of my life... my testimony, if you will.

For the majority of my life, I grew up on what we (in the hood) affectionately call: Soul Food. It's delicious. It's amazing. It's fried. God bless my mom. A small southern woman with a heart of gold(en fried chicken) and a always a full pitcher of sweet tea!

She always had the best intentions of making sure that we always had a good, home-cooked meal on the table. Little did I know that my frame, body structure, and bone mass, when combined with mass quantities of food (especially that of the fried variety) would slowly (but surely) begin to kill me...

Say what!?

Yes....

My mother tried to kill me.

Certainly not intentionally.

After many years of having what some Doctors would call a "weight problem" I found myself only getting bigger and bigger.

Now don't get me wrong... I LOVE being a 'big guy'... Being naturally stronger and more intimidating is good... especially in my case, as I may or may not be what some would call 'soft.'

However, I needed to be a HEALTHY 'big guy.'

Enter a new diet plan: Stop drinking sodas.

That's right. My diet, as of November 2005 was simply the 'no-soda-pop-having-at-all-unless-it-was-a-diet-,-but-certainly-not-a-full-fat-soda' diet.

I found myself getting sicker and sicker as I moved into December of that year.

I knew it was because my body couldn't deal with my rather large hind-quarters.

Sicker.

Sicker..

Sicker...

I became.

Until Super Bowl Sunday (2006) when my family had to rush a rather unconscious 'Slim' to the ER.

I'm not sure if you know much about blood sugar, but the average person should be around 120 (give or take, of course)... 250 is not bad, but certainly not good! 350: you got some issues. 450: you need to get to the hospital. 550: you might want to consider making your peace with God.

750: You're The Slim on Super Bowl Sunday.

"You really shouldn't be alive right now."

Very comforting words from the Dr.

After clocking in between 650 and 700 lbs. at the hospital that night, I spent the week in the ICU of Lee Memorial Hospital... essentially preparing myself for kick the proverbial bucket.

Evidently, I was diabetic. Runs in my family, so I'm not sure why I was surprise by this notion.

To make matters worse, I wasn't controlling my diet AT ALL. Not that I was gorging myself, by any means... quite the opposite actually. I would 1, 2, even 3 days without eating... not really thinking or paying attention to it.

Come to find out I was living (as a 700lb. man) on a 1200 kCal diet... UNTIL I cut out sodas and dropped to (in some cases) just a few hindered calories a day. This propelled my diabetes and sickness.

In affect, going on a diet almost killed me.

For the second time in my life, I as at the receiving end of attempted murder... the weapon of choice: food.

I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes. Completely insulin dependant.

"The VERY BEST case scenario, would be that you would be on the insulin shot (5 times/day) for the next four years. If that went well, you'd move to the insulin pill for another four years." the Doctor explained later that week.

"All in all, IF YOU'RE LUCKY, you'll be spending AT LEAST the next 8 years on insulin."

"Great..." I facetiously thought...

God obviously had bigger plans for my life.

I ended up walking out of that joint after a week in Intensive Care. I walked out with a new sense of life and a new diet.

I quickly lost 150lbs. and with the weight went the diabetes.

This morning, just shy of two years later, I clocked in at 398lbs. Some would still say "Dang, you're huge." however they fail to realize I'm nearly HALF of what I once was.

Which leads me to the purpose for this blog.

I'm on a new quest (as far as my diet goes, anyway)

Now, armed with a 24-hour gym, personal trainer, and dietitian I continue to push forward to drop some 'El-Bees'.

150 to actually.

I joined www.traineo.com, an online resource that helps you track your diet, exercise, and weight. You can see my progress here:

traineo
http://theslim.traineo.com.

Please, if you would be so kind, I need all of the encouragement and motivation that I can get! Simply check in once a day, week, or even month to check on my progress. If you see that I'm not working out, or I'm eating bad, or simply not losing weight... Call me on it! Push me.

So yeah... moral of the story: Live. Don't die. And help me out.

And be careful of what you eat, as somebody may be trying to kill you with it!

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Thoughts...

...swinging soundly.
Back and forth.
Teeter.
Totter.

I have a head. It is full of thoughts. When left unattended it causes lack of sleep, lack of appetite, lack of really caring about anything.

The things that I DO care about end up flashing morbid variations and skewed versions of the reality.

I'm currently on Lunesta. It seems to be the only thing that makes me sleep. 1mg, 2mg and 3mg is how they come. 1mg is what they give the average person with a sleeping disorder. 3mg is what they give the big boys with chronic insomnia. I take 4 a night. Is it just me or is that 12x the dosage of a regular person who randomly can't sleep?

And of course, two of the top side effects are: Hallucinations and Vivid Dreams. Sometimes I can't tell the difference. Am I dreaming these crazy things? Or am I actually doing these?

Does 'Blogger' exist? Am I actually typing this right now?

Hello?

Can you hear me?

"Yes!?" my dog responds.

"Seriously, Dude... you're a dog..." I lazily retort.

"You seem to have thoughts swinging soundly. Back and forth. Teeter. Totter."

"You Sir, are quite profound. Not to mention observant." I say, still skeptical of my talking dog... "Why don't you do you any other tricks but 'sit'? I mean, other dogs do them? And why do you only chew up random crap? Do you have mange? Do you feel lonely? Do you need a friend? Do you like me and Laura?..." I seem to mutter questions without hesitation.

"Bro, you need to slow down." says my dog.

"Seriously," I think to myself "am I REALLY taking advice from my dog?"

I suppose it makes sense. I mean, if my dog can talk I figure he's got to be relatively smart.

He's cute too. And part Chow-Chow. How now brown Chow... HA. I'm funny.... and mildly alone.

And by 'mildly' I mean a lot. Lonely enough for my mind to wander... to think. And when left unattended it causes lack of sleep, lack of appetite, lack of really caring about anything.

The things that I DO care about end up flashing morbid variations and skewed versions of the reality.

I like all of you... love most. Adore only one... and she's away. She's better than cake. And MAC computers.

As a matter of fact, she's better than:
_ guitars
_ amps
_ Italian sodas
_ iron and wood 'music man' figurines
_ Leppraclaus
_ ice cream
_ Lunesta (TM, of course)
_ talking dogs
_ Mexican food
_ Chinese food
_ Italian food
_ food in general
_ weight loss
_ red wine
_ lactic acid fermentation
_ surround sound systems
_ new baby smells (not the poopy kind though..)
_ baby seals
_ mush

... and much like a 'RONCO' commercial: MUCH, MUCH MORE!

Whatever... she's not here... maybe with some Lunesta, I can at least THINK she's here...

Okaybye.

p.s.- sorry for the rant.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Life kinda sucks...

....when she's not around.

I miss her smile. And lots of other things.

Friday, October 26, 2007

A poem for my wife, while I'm at work:

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
When I get home from work
do you you wanna make out o somesing?

PENN STATE!!!!!!!

Monday, October 22, 2007

Why...

...is life so hard? Why is the right path narrow?

Why is sin so much fun, and easy to do?

Why are rainbows good?

Why do I bother asking?

Why...

Y...

Hmmm..

I think.. therefore I am.

A penny saved is a penny earned...

I'll give you a penny for your thoughts... penny spent...

Care for two?

...cents that is...

or perhaps sense?

I have a few of the those... 7 if you want to get technical...

Whatev....
...er

Do you think that you know me?

Do you think you have a clue?

Here's one:

I'm human.

You could learn everything there is to know about me by that statement.

I'm naive. Ignorant. A sinner. A struggler. I'm dishonest. I have no will power.

I suck.

Do you?

Care to wager?

Whataya gonna do?

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

The Boss...

This may just be pensive rambling of a bitter soul... could just be a random notion... could just be a proverbial wild hair up my proverbial rear-end...

BUT... I was driving to work yesterday. Doesn't seem to out of the ordinary, huh? Of course, I wasn't in my car, as it has just been finished... I was driving in the Bidwells (Laura's bosses) Toyota Highlander. One of the best features of their pimp wagon is SIRIUS satellite radio.

I've always thought to myself "Self, SIRIUS and XM aren't really that cool. They're pretty much, whatever. Who really needs 'em?"

Well, that was before I had one at my disposal. I've fallen in love with the comedy channel. It's 24 hours of stand-up comedy, and they play a TON of Mitch Hedberg which is AWESOME!

Anyway, there was and AD on (for being 'ad free' radio, there sure are a lot of ads!) for another channel. Channel 10.

My mind began to wander as I heard what came from the stock system in this g-ride. I heard that Bruce Springsteen now has HIS OWN channel on SIRIUS.



That's right, and channel that plays NON-STOP (except for the 'commercial-free' commercial breaks...) Bruce Springsteen music. Concerts, interviews, CDs... crazy.

I thought, "Man, what am I doing wrong? Is it no talent?" I'd like to think I'm kind of a decent guitar player, so hopefully that's out of the question.

"Is it for a lack of drive?"

No... I play my hind-quarters off every chance that I get.

"Is it my image?"

No, this picture (from my Springsteen archive.. you know, from when me and him hung out all the time...) pretty much proves that:



I mean, seriously... I'm strugglin' to just make a record that people will actually want to listen to and this dude gets his OWN TWENTY-FOUR HOUR channel on SIRIUS? I mean, I understand that he's 'The Boss' and all... but dang... can't a brother catch a break?

Yeah... here's a nerdy ending for you:

< / r a n t >


Friday, October 5, 2007

Enspireashun...

...I need some.

My 'artistic life' is becoming routine. I play a lot of music, however I'm not writing much and I'm recording less! I draw up new shirts, and marketing ideas that pretty much never make it to the computer screen, or less end up printed.

What's the deal?

I'm in the most amazing, adventurous, crazy time of my life. My dog is cool. My wife is pretty awesome too. My friends are the best that you could ask for. I've got a great job working with some of the coolest people I know.

Seems that my creativity is significantly decreased when I'm on the top of world. I re-read a Secret today that I ran across the other day:



Now, I'm not saying that I'm depressed, don't hear that... however the writer makes sense to me. Seems as if I'm that artist that envokes their jealousy. It's not even so much that I'm not inspired... as there are many things in my life that strike awe and wonder within me. It's just that I can't harness the inspiration that I recieve daily.

What's a dude to do?

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Not just some lame bumper sticker...

I realized today that I love my wife.

"Weird..." you're thinking, I'm sure.

"...how can he just now realize that?"

I don't know everything in life, but I know a lot... maybe more than most. I even knew a lot about us:

I knew that I was in love with her the very moment I saw her. I knew that she would be my wife in that moment as well. I knew that it would be able a battle to win her heart... a battle that could only be won with God on my side! I knew that she would make an amazing wife, and an incredible mother.

I didn't, however, really understand intimacy. I tried to get a deeper understanding the word.... so I went to webster.com.

1b : belonging to or characterizing one's deepest nature
2 : marked by very close association, contact, or familiarity <intimate knowledge of the someone>

See, I had a knowledge of Laura Beth... but not an INTIMATE knowledge of Laura Beth.

Before we got married, we might as well have been living together: I would get to the house around 7:30 in the morning... just in time to kiss her goodbye as she headed off to work. I would then make myself breakfast, grab a shower, get dressed and head off to work. After a 'long day at the office' I would come back to the house for dinner and a movie (or whatever we had planned that night), I would then stay until it got way too late and I would head home, or to my parents house, or whatever.

I thought "Man, there's not really that much more that I could learn about her..." I would even go so far as to say "...and there's no way that I could love her more than I do now!"

I couldn't have been more wrong.

As I sit on my couch... roughly 10 'til 9pm on Wedneesday... I'm coming to the conclusion that I didn't actually love her until today.

Don't get me wrong... I LIKED her a whole lot bunches, and I was (and am) most certainly IN love with her.

God has been teaching me over the last couple weeks (you know, in the wicked long time I've been married) the difference between loving someone and and being IN love with somebody.

It's easy to be in love with my wife. She's wicked hot. She's more-than-intelligent. She's got an amazing sense of humor, and an even more incredible personality. You can refer to previous posts for a more detailed list.

However,

It's hard (sometimes)

to love

my wife.

She nags me. She whines a lot. She doesn't use her blinker when switches lanes or turns. She always forgets to log out of Myspace and Facebook when she's done. And she can't seem to close the bag of doggy treats EVERY morning.

But I realize it's in these moments that I can not possibly live without her. God has designed her (idiosyncrasies and all) to fit me perfectly. You see, all the things she does that drive me nuts are things I don't do... as all the things that I do that drive her up a wall are things that SHE doesn't do. It's like pieces of a puzzle finally falling into place.

In my quest to discover the meaning of intimacy, I read a dozen or so articles from teachers, philosohpers and religious leaders trying to describe what intimacy is.

Finally, I ran into someone who helped to make it make more sense. Jim Hines is the Executive Pastor of Summit Church, and also happens to be my direct suppirior at work. He went to the Ukrane a few weeks ago (as he does about a billion times a year) and upon his arrivial home (just in time to make it our wedding!) all that he could talk about was how much he missed his wife.

"Outside of anything obvious," he said "I missed the feeling of Mary sleeping next to me."

"Sleeping alone just sucked!"

He had my attention.

"You know what intimacy is, Slim?"

"No... not really... enlighten me."

"Sitting on the couch next to my wife, knowing that no matter what idiot or bonehead move I make, she'll still be right there... on the couch loving me just the same."

Wow.

I pondered that notion today at dinner.

I'm not sure why.

But I did.

She looked across the table at me and asked if I wanted to go to the christian bookstore with her. Not something I was entirely interested in.

"Nah... I'm good." I said without a thought or hesitation.

I finished my dinner, cleaned off the table and sat down to watch TV and surf the net. This concept of intimacy kept running in circles around my brain.

Many circles spun 'round my cranium long enough for me to notice that I was sitting.... on my couch... alone.

I was sad. My stomach turned. A single tear fell from one of the round things at the top of my head... eyes, I think they're called. I knew that she would be back, after all she was just going to the store. I knew that the loved me and felt loved.

But still, I felt alone... a part from the lover, my partner, my mate, my wife. A feeling that I didn't want to feel?

What changed? Did I miss the nagging? The perpetual not logging out of online networking communities?

No.

I missed her.

All of her.

I loved my wife for the first time... the way that God intended.

Life seemed in an instant to make a little bit more sense.

I sit here... breathing a fresh breath of life. Content. Happy. Loving everything about my life and my wife.... all of it... all of her.

And with that, I'm off to bed... with my wife... whom I love.

Friday, September 28, 2007

p.s. - I SUCK at blogging...

... so here's the deal...

I've had a 'private' blog that very few people actually know about (and at that even they don't really know who I am) since I was in High School.

I post all my dirty little secrets on that blog... All the strange thoughts I have... the more strange interactions that I have with people that I generally keep to myself.

As I was writing a new poem in it today... I suddenly realized that I keep my 'private' blog pretty much up-to-date, however I never write in my public blog. What the crap is up with that? Do I just not care? Was I simply doing it because it was a trend? Am I doing it because I wanted to get responses from people, that I just didn't get?

Was I doing it because I truly wanted help, and accountability and nobody responded but one person? (Thank you so much for your heart Bro.)

Why do we blog?

As of September 2007, blog search engine Technorati was tracking more than 106 million blogs. ONE HUNDRED SIX MILLION blogs.

Do we think people care about our stories? Do we think people are interested in what we have to say? Speak now, or forever hold your peace...

I thought about this a lot today, as I was sitting at my desk listening to the new album from a buddy of mine, Scotty McFall (myspace.com/scottmcfall) at deafining levels on account of me being the only one here.

Can a life be changed by a paragraph that I 'e-pen' here? By a sentence? A word?

As some of you know, I'm a POST SECRET fanatic.. I've been following this incredible website since like '99. It's an amazing art website, where you create a homemade postcard with your deepest, darkest secret and mail it in. People can e-mail the website and 'respond' to some of the secrets. It's really a great thing.

I, myself, have actually had two of my secrets posted on there in the last few years.

The site is changed every Sunday. I logged on today to check the new secrets. One REALLY caught my eye:



Now, it wasn't the the card that got my attention so much as what followed did. You see, a young man named Ryan in South Dakota responded to the postcard saying:

"Dear Frank,

I feel the same way. I often wonder why I even have a phone because I rarely receive calls. If there was a way we could contact each other that would be cool. My phone number is 605-212-7787 (with permission).

Sincerely,
Ryan (with permission)"

I thought "For real!?! Did this guy ACTUALLY put his phone number up on there? Does he not know that he's going to get FLOODED with calls from people like me, who just want to call him because he put it up there?!!"

Of course, as is my nature, I instantly grabbed the phone, opened it up, took a deep breath and called the number.

"What am I going to say to him?" I thought "Should I prank him? Should I be serious? Will he even pick up?"

The phone rang.

It rang again.

And again.

"Man, I'm going to have to leave a message... huh."

It rang.

And then once more.

After the 5th ring, a soft spoken voice came across the other side... "Hello?"

"Hey Ryan?"

"Yes."

"My name is Slim, from Ft. Myers, FL"

"Slim!! How are you!"

I had to look at my phone... did this guy really know me? I mean seriously... what are the odds?

"I'm fine, thank you! And yourself?" I responded.

"I've been so great lately."

"Yeah? Why's that?"

"I've talked to some of the most amazing people lately, from ALL over the world. It's amazing how I can't get anyone around me to speak to me... I have no real friends... nobody here who actually cares. But for the past week I've been flooded with people calling up, just to tell me that they love me."

I hesitated to speak as my mind raced... in THIS moment God convicted me in such a huge way. Because I AM everyone in South Dakota that neglected this guy. I AM the person who makes people sad and lonely. I AM the person makes others feel left out... looked-over... worthless, not for the things that I do, but for the things that I do NOT do.

At the moment, the only thing that was in my brain was "They will know that we are Christians by our love."

Man.

"I love you." Three very simple words. Words that get thrown around too much. But do we ever think about how powerful those words are? Maybe they've lost their meaning to those of us who hear them constantly, but do we think about how much it affects the people who never hear it?

I poured through the Word, trying to find descriptions of love.

Proverbs 10:12
Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs.

Song of Solomon 8:6

Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave.

Song of Solomon 8:7
Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away. If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned.

John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

1 Corinthians 13:1 (and some change)
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Colossians 3:14
And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

1 John 3:16
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.

1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

1 John 4:8
Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love: we certainly take that word for granted.

My conviction continues. If you are reading this... then I'm sure we are friends, maybe family... Can you remember the last time I told you that I love you? Have I ever?

So.. it comes to this.. the question echos again: Can a life be changed by a paragraph that I 'e-pen' here? By a sentence? A word?

Yes.

And that word is 'love'.

I love you.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Things I love...

...about her.



• Her smile
• Her eyes
• Her voice
• Her own little language (i.e.: "Fiffernug", "Jean Ween" etc.)
• Her humor
• Her wit
• Her sense of style
• Her classy-ness
• She's a dreamer.
• She’s prone to extreme silliness.
• She’s honest and trustworthy and loyal.
• She has a bizarre sense of humor.
• She makes a good eggs.
• She’s cute.
• She puts up with me.
• She's going to be a FANTASTIC mom
• Her energy is infectious
• She's adventurous, seeking out new experiences.
• She's sexy AND smart.
• How she continues to fight for me, even when I neglect her
• Her unflagging curiosity about everything around her.
• She's a great cook.
• She's not afraid of speaking out even if it means going against the majority.
• How she questions things most people take for granted.
• She's not afraid of goofy fun.
• Her writing is from the heart. She may claim she's not a writer, but her blog entries have made me laugh out loud and also teary-eyed.
• Her positive attitude and humour through experiences many other people would be constantly whining about and using as a crutch. Instead, these experiences seem just to make her stronger.
• The way she helps friends find cool opportunities.
• She doesn't mince words, especially when she's pissed off about something. You always know where you stand with her. No mindgames, no emotional manipulation.
• She's a great listening ear, sympathetic but also objective. Doesn't let me get away with self-indulgent crap.
• She's intellectually and emotionally honest.
• She's gorgeous.
• She's a loyal friend and an amazing woman. I feel incredibly lucky to be her friend.
• She has what I believe to be the softest skin in the universe.
• She can dance
• She can sing too.. although she doesn't always get the lyrics right...
• She is extremely photogenic; she does not take a bad picture!
• Spending the day with her guarantees lots of laughter
• She never takes life for granted.
• She gets such a joy out of her family's joy.
• She looks comfortable and classy in anything, from a slinky formal dress to baggy sweatpants and a t-shirt.
• The fact that despite her crazy schedule, she still makes it a priority to find time for me.
• She could spend hours browsing the children's section of a bookstore.
• Her playfulness.
• The depth of caring she shows her friends and family.
• The fact that she loves me
• Her sweet face
• The fact that she let's the Dude sleep on the bed in the master bedroom when I'm not around.
• "You wanna snuggle one time some times?"
• "I love you a whole lot of bunches of oodles plus 2?"
• "You... you... you... wanna get meeearrrieeed?"
• Her family
• Her friends
• Her stories
• Her laugh
• Her love.
• Her commitment to God
• Her general outlook on life
• Her heart
• Her life
• Her warmth
• Two words: "Frit" "tata"
• How she's picked up MY own little language
• How she moves her hands when she talks
• The cute little dance she does when she thinks nobody is looking.....
• How God designed her specifically to mesh with me
• How God made her my wife (to be)
• How it doesn't matter how long we're apart, she'll write little cards for everyday that we're away from each other.
• The way she hugs me
• The way she kisses
• Her smell
• Her touch
• She does my laundry

I love every single thing about her. As the days get closer to our wedding, I started to realize that I'm just falling deeper and deeper in love with her. I can't wait until we are old and hardly functional, so that I could look back on my life and realize that I had the greatest life ever, and that people would have killed to have my life and to have what I have. To look back on my life and realize that there really is a God, and that he loves me and shows me daily how much he loves me by putting such an amazing, stunningly beautiful woman in my life.

God is good.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Sorry, sorry, sorry...

...My sincerest apologies for the delay in writing a new post. Crazy busy I am.

Anyway... the quick run-down... all the flights home were good until we got stuck in Boston overnight. However because if it, I fulfilled a couple life-long dreams.

1.) Tour Boston.
Thats right... what's a dude to do in Boston for a day? That's right I walked around until I got tired and then took a trolley tour around town. Good times.

2.) Roll 1st class in an airplane.
Thats right... what's a dude to do after being stuck in Boston for a day? The nice lady gave us 1st class tickets because of getting stuck there. Good times.

I made it home, Laura picked me up. She was hot. We had lunch... a fantastic lunch might I add.

I went home a wrestled the Dude. Off to mom and dads for dinner later that night. Back home... it's good to be home.

S

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I calmly lifted the deck in the air. Slowly. Very slowly.

Saturday

I woke up too early this morning. Dougie B has a meeting with Edward at 11:30am this morning, and then we're headed to Pipeline for a Committee meeting at 1pm. So, really, I didn't need to wake up until like noon...

I had planned on waking up around 9ish, that way I would still be able to catch breakfast in the morning.

Well, I feel asleep with my TV on and at 9am CNN woke me up. I remember it being nine, because the guy on the news said it... so I jumped up, grabbed a shower, put on my nice, clean, hand-washed clothes (they do it right in A-Freak-ah!) and headed out the door for some brreeeakfast.

I ate a lot of fruit, some potatoes, and an egg... over easy. I then sat there for a little while waiting for Dougie B. What seemed like an hour went by quickly. I thought to myself "Dang, Dougie B sure is sleeping in! It's gotta be past 10am!"

So I opened the computer for two reasons:
1.) To try to post more pictures on the blog so that I could try to get caught up.
-and-
2.) To see the time.

I actually didn't look at the clock right away... I connected to the net and opened Firefox and notepad to type up a blog post.

After a few moments, I thought about Dougie B again... looked at the clock... it read: 12:48am. Now this clock is still set to Ft. Myers time, so that I know what time it is there. 12:48 Ft. Myers time is 7:48am here. SEVEN!! I freakin' woke up at seven!

Now I'm still tired, and know that I could've slept in for 2 more hours!

It's okay though... I'm not going to go to sleep tonight... I'm just going to stay up all night. That way, hopefully, I'll be able to sleep the 8 hours from here to Amsterdam!

My plan is to pass-out from here to Amsterdam (8 hours), relax during our layover (2.5 hours) then rely on Wal-Som (you know we ghetto fab) for the flight from Amsterdam to Boston (9.5 hours). We then have a THREE hour layover in Boston, where we'll be headed out to grab lunch in the city (if possible), and I'll just tough it out from Boston to Charlotte and from Charlotte to the Fort.

I know it's rather selfish, but I've been praying that God will give us A330 air busses from here to America... also that the seats next to me would be empty too... say a prayer, will ya!

Steve was right on time... as always. They say here that there are two times: Africa time and Steve time. "Africa time" is a 'show up whenever you feel like it' kind of time. You can set your clocks to "Steve time" he's NEVER late!

Anyway... off to Pipeline we went... it's not a really long drive to Pipeline from the guesthouse, but it's certainly not a short drive either...

It's a strange day here in Pipeline today. It's very warm, the sun is very high... the people seem to be really happy today. It's as if they don't realize that they live in the slums.

These are truly beautiful people!

We had a meeting... from 2pm - 6pm ... I WAS DYING!!

So, I did what I always do... I went outside to play with the kids. Steve says to never do this.... I have a rebellious streak.

These two girls in particular were just AWESOME! Sharon and Sheila. What amazing girls, both VERY educated. They walked up to me, and put there arms around me and said "Hey Slim!"

"Jambo," I replied "how are you girls doing today?"

"Mzuri sana, Slim." "Do you know what that means?"

"Of course! I've been learning a LOT of Swahili while I've been here!"

"Oh, that's good! We have a question?"

"Anything! Go 'head!"

"Do you have a family?"

Man, my gut wrenched.. how do I answer that? "Yes, yes I do. I have an amazing family and you have nothing?" I've been asked many questions before. Some of them were even difficult questions. In most cases, it was easy to answer... never did I think that one of the most difficult questions would come from the mouth of a 5th grade orphan!

"Yes I do. I have a Mama and Baba, a Ndungu, and 2 Dada's! They're awesome people!" I said.

"That's so good Slim! Do you have any kids?"

"No, not yet. I'd like to have kids though!"

"Slim?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think that when you have your kids, you can bring them here to see us, one day?"

I had to fight back the tears. My gut turned, my eyes hurt, and my throat became more dry than that of a pothead.

"Of course.. I would love for you to meet them!" I finally answered.

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

"No." I replied, heading towards the 'fiance punchline'

"Well, when I'm older, I'll be your girlfriend!"

"Hahaha... that's very nice, but I'm actually engaged to an amazing woman back home. Her name is Laura."

"She must be very beautiful!"

"Oh, you have NO clue!"

"When do you get married?"

"In just 6 weeks! Can you believe it!?!"

"Wow! That's very good, Slim. I wish you the best of luck!"

"Asante sana" I replied.

"Slim?"

"::chuckling:: yes?"

"Can we ask you a question?"

"::chuckling continues:: Of course!!"

"When you get married, do you think that you can bring your wife here to meet us? We want to play with her and do her hair...?"

The tears finally came out... "Of course... she would love it here, and love to meet you!"

"Do you think that she would want to be our best friend?"

"She already is!" I exclaimed.

I got called back into the meeting at this point. I didn't want to stop talking with the pair, but it wasn't long before we were able to talk again.

"How much Swahili have you learned, Slim?"

"Not much." I replied as I rattled of the list of words that I knew.

"We'll be right back!!" the two shouted.

During this time, a small group of kids came to find me. Some of them had seen me doing magic for Steve and wanted to see some. I was surprised at this. Edward told me that the kids would be too scared of magic and think I was Satan. As "Satan" was not quite how I wanted to be perceived by the kids, I pretty much kept it to myself and adults.

I said no... "It's too scary for you!"

"Please, please, please, please!" they rang out.

So I ran through a couple card tricks. They were speechless. I then made a 1Ksh coin appear out of thin air. Then I made it disappear, and reappear behind a small child's ear.

They watched in amazement as the 1Ksh coin changed to a 5Ksh coin... RIGHT BEFORE THEIR EYES!

As if that wasn't enough, the 5Ksh magically doubled to a 10Ksh coin at the wave of my hand!

They were stunned!! "More, more, more!!!" they shouted in unison, like a well rehearsed choir "More!!" they cried.

"Okay. I'll show you ONE MORE. But you've gotta promise that you wont get scared!"

"We promise." they chimed again.

I didn't explain to them what I was about to do. I just asked a girl to pick a card, by her "own free will" of course *wink**wink*

She chose the Queen of Spades. I then instructed her to put the card back on the top of the deck. I flipped the card back over and told them to watch closely.

I calmly lifted the deck in the air. Slowly. Very slowly.

Their eyes were GLUED to the deck.

"Watch closely!" I said as I let the suspense build up.

"Do you see it?" I asked.

"Do you see it!?!"

They didn't know what they were looking for... as I hard not really started the trick.

"Concentrate." I instructed them.

"Concentrate hard!"

Slowly but surly, the card LIFTED itself right off of the deck! It float nearly 3 inches RIGHT OFF THE DECK!

At this, the kids SHRIEKED and BOLTED away from me as I laughed.

Soon the girls came back. Sheila handed me a folded up piece of paper and said "This should help you with your Swahili!" I opened the paper. It was Sheila's version of the Swahili crash course.

Sharon lifted out her hand and said "This is for Laura. I made it for her." as she handed me a necklace. "Tell her I love her and can't wait to meet her!" she whispered in my ear.

What amazing kids these are.

I'm very happy to be going home, but very sad to leave. Kenya, very quickly became my home away from home.

We left there... headed back to the guesthouse to handle some business, and then dipped to the Java House for dinner.

It was good, as usual.

Taxied back to the guesthouse for some MUCH needed sleep.

I'm heading home on the 28 hour traveling journey. Goo.

S

Saturday, July 28, 2007

I had the stir-fry Lamb and Almonds again...

Friday

Another kind of uneventful day.

I woke up... I ate breakfast... Steve picked us up.

We went down David Diamonds hotel to pick up some stuff that he left here for us. Some pens, some candy for the kids and such.

We when headed to Pipeline to meet with Pastor George real quick. He's doing a funeral today of one of the boys in his church, second one in two weeks. Crazy! We needed to take pictures of his "orphanage" to send to Dave to get his advice on how to build it up bigger and stronger.

Surprisingly, our brief meeting was actually brief for once.

We left there and went o the Village Market. This is in a SUPER upscale part of town, where are the people from the Embassies live. Lot's of white people... rich white people...

The Village Market is basically a mall. I really wasn't interested in the place, but we went there to try to meet up with Bobby Pall. Bobby is a mucho world-renowned photographer. He's the guy who made the book that my mom has.

He's world class... fantastic... and an AWESOME guy. Him and I really clicked, I think more-so than anyone else on this trip. He's a very encouraging guy, a very smart guy, and just an all around talented guy. It was good meeting him... I should've got a picture of him though!

Anyway... we met over Coke Lights at the place across the street from his studio. We talked about the project and how it's going and such. I told him of my lack of shots showing real need. See, everywhere we shot was like orphanages and such, where the kids were being well-fed and happy, so most of the shots I been able to get have all been of bright, smiling kids!

He told me that he would flip through his archive and pull out some good shots and put them on disc for me.

We decided to meet back up for dinner. Siam Thai it was!

We met up with Bobby at Siam Thai, I had the stir-fry Lamb and Almonds again. Just amazing!

After a good dinner, Bobby took us back to the AACC guesthouse for some sleep.

I got to talk to Laura again, over the Internet (man, I miss her voice!) and post some things and such...

Off to bed I went to get ready for my last FULL day in A-Freak-ah.

See youse guyses tomorrow!

S

Friday, July 27, 2007

"Does THAT hurt!?!"

Thursday

It is 12:43am your time, 7:43am "my" time. I'm so tired. I haven't really slept the last two nights, on account of my leg hurting so badly. It's pretty discolored now, and swollen. It still just feels like a really bad bruise. I'll hope so anyway.

We had an earlier start today.. just by one hour. Steve arrived at 8am sharp with Patrick and his mother (Mama) Anna.



Now here's the deal with Anna, she is the mother of 4 children. She lives in a small 10'x10' house. If you count it, that's 5 people in the house... each one getting 20sq ft. Seems like a nightmare, huh? Well, I suppose that now would be a good time to tell you that Anna has also taken in 6, yes SIX orphaned relatives of hers. Cousins, nephews, nieces, etc... that's ELEVEN PEOPLE in a 100sq ft house. Let's redo the math, shall we? 100sq ft / 11 people = 9.. 9sq ft. to live in. Can you imagine that?

Anyway... we brought Anna and Patrick some food, as we were sure that they were starving. And headed up to Kijabe which is way up in the mountains a little. In fact, the road parallels with the Great Rift Valley. Now, I'll tell you what... you've never seen anything until you see the Great Rift Valley. It stretches over most of Africa. In fact, here in Nairobi on the way to Kijabe it reaches it's highest altitude ... over 8,000ft high!!

I just couldn't help but take in the scenery. Such a beautiful sight! Everything around was all farm land. So you would see people living in a way that I would've imagined that God intended. Just living off of the land, making all of their own clothes. Raising their own cattle to eat and get milk from... it was amazing. I can't begin to describe the beauty! I wish that I could've taken pictures... just very hard to get good ones from inside a moving Safari Truck... know what I mean?

We continued up the road making small talk with Patrick and his mother.

On the way there, we were stopped by THREE police road blocks in a row. It's very weird here... they'll just stop you for no reason, most of the time. They'll want to randomly search you and your passengers. Or randomly run your plates... or in Steve's case, randomly mess with you.

During the second police stop, one officer came to Steve's window and pulled out his gun, told him that he was under arrest and to get out of the car. The second officer then pulled out HIS gun and came to MY window! Now, I would not have been afraid had I not known that in this country Police, Admin. Police, and the Army can shoot you anytime they want, without any reason. "For real!?!" I thought.

Steve asked the officer "For what am I being arrested for? I've done nothing wrong!" the officer looked at him and said "Okay, you can go."

SAY WHAT!?!?!?!?!

"Did anyone else see what happened!" I though... so yeah... turns out here... the police get so bored that they'll pull you over and tell you that you're under arrest just to see your reaction. If you're calm, like Steve, they'll just let you go... if you freak out you're probably headed for a bullet...

Another fun fact, police don't move around in cars... well, some of them do, but most don't. Therefore, if a cop stops you and tells you to drive him somewhere, YOU MUST. It doesn't matter if you're late for an appointment and he's going the opposite direction. It doesn't matter if he wants you to drive him to Japan, YOU MUST. If you try to speed off, he will shoot you tires out. If you try to speed off and you're too slow, he'll just shoot you! Crazy!

So, anyway, after a couple of scares we were back on our way.

We reached the CURE International Hospital.



This facility was AMAZING. It was immaculate, and very well built. It's an American run hospital for children. It's also located on the property with the local hospital (the good hospital.) Sadly, this hospital is so far away from the city and the slums.

We got Patrick in to see Dr. Joseph Thuri, however he was in surgery and was evidently going to be a while. So, we showed Patrick's leg to another Dr. there... his jaw immediately hit the floor!

He literally ran to get Dr. Thuri, who came rushing back to look at it. He told us that these were deformative growths on his leg (2 of them) and that he also had about 4 more across his body. He got him all checked out, and set a date for Patrick's surgeries.





We decided to go ahead and pay for Patrick's surgeries... we planned on them being a few thousand dollars... we were surprised by the total. Two. Well, just over two. $230 to be precise.

For real? $230 could fix this boy? Amazing.

After that, we had the good Dr. check my leg... "Take your pants off." He says "Dr. Thuri, don't you think you should AT LEAST take me to dinner first!?!" I replied... yeah... evidently he didn't get the joke. He stood there confused... so I just dropped trou.

He looked at the swollen, discolored craziness and said "How in the world did that happen!?!" I explained the story to him... he laughed... a lot.

He then started pushing the spot over and over again, which was truly excruciating! He would push it hard and go "Does that hurt?" I felt like punching him in the neck and going "Does THAT hurt!?! Booyah!!" ... "Yes, it hurts badly Dr.!" I replied.

He had me on my back, bending my leg all sorts of ways saying "That hurt?" "Yes, yes... a thousand times yes!"

"Fracture!" he exclaimed. Now to really appreciate it, you need to re-read that word, but really roll the 'r' to get the dialect going... it was more like "Frrrrrrrracture!"

"What do you mean, frrrrrracture!?!" I said, "It's just a bruise!"

"Nope. It's a fracture."

"Well, what am I supposed to do?"

"It's not very bad, yet. Just take it easy for the next month. No running or jumping."

Now it was my turn to laugh... right in his face!! No running OR jumping? Shucks!! I was really hoping that I would get to run and jump... oh well...

So yeah... now my left femur is fractured do to a faulty piece of wood on a wooden bridge. I would also like to sate, for the record, that the breaking of said wood had nothing to do with my shear size and stature. I'm not fat. I'm fluffy.

The board broke on its own accord due to it's inherent weakness.

So, yeah... gonna take it easy for the next month or so.

Anyway... we left there... headed for Kibera to drop Patrick and Anna off.

Luckily, we didn't get hit by any police check points on the way back.

We got into Kibera, and headed towards their "house". We let them out, but Anna wanted us to see her house. She's very proud of it. We walked a short ways up the street and found her place. A small room... ten feet by ten feet. She used newspaper as wallpaper.... it was plastered all around the walls, with a HUGE picture of Jesus hanging up in the center. Some clean pots hung on the wall. There were three beds, they were all maid up properly. The floor was spotless. She truly kept her house EXCEPTIONALLY clean!





We walked back outside and met some of her kids and orphans. I was able to snap a picture of the ones that were there. Most were out though.



It was very sad. As we drove away I couldn't help but think over and over again.. that these people have nothing, and in Anna's case she has lived outside of Kibera. She knows of a life outside of the slums. Yet she's happy and thankful for God's blessings. Man, I suck at life!

We headed from there to "Saints Alive Church" near Pipeline. This is Edward's church. He is the youth pastor there. But I think that "youth pastor" here means "Children's Pastor" back in the states.

This was actually a very nice church (considering the circumstances.) It was a big church, on a big piece of land. Big stage with a sound system. It was nice. This church was actually where Pastor Amos got married.

They had a separate building called the "Saints Alive Youth Church" where the youth were... (a bunch of preschoolers during nap time.. haha) also a very nice facility!



They had a RIDICULOUSLY long meeting with the people from Action Kenya Now, a micro-lending company. I was so bored, so I went outside to take pictures of the chickenses, and these kids:














I went back in to find Amos sleeping on the couch, in the middle of the meeting!! Haha... how punk rock!

He woke up and took me to the sanctuary to film the women's group meeting in there. I literally took maybe 25 seconds of footage and maybe 3 pictures... there was nothing going on in there....

So Amos and I just sat up on the stage talking about our wives, and wife-to-be's... Talking about how/where we met, how long we "courted" before getting engaged and such. He then asked if we wanted kids... I felt like punching him in the neck and saying "Does that hurt!?!" however this didn't quite seem relevant anymore.

I told him yes... we'd like to have 3. If we can, have two and adopt the third. He thought that was awesome. "How long are you going to wait?" he asked "Dude, we're just trying to make it to the wedding... ask me in a couple months!" I responded... so I asked out long they waited. Funny story... he went on to tell me that they got married on November 5th, and their daughter was born on August 5th... EXACTLY nine months later... haha...

He said "We wasted not one second!" haha... good times.

The lame, boring meeting was finally over. We headed out.

Steve dropped us off at the Nairobi Java House for some American food, and we taxied back to the guesthouse.

I was able to post a little bit and have a good conversation with my sweet babe.

Then I took me and my frrrrrractured leg to bed.

I'm not sure what is on the agenda for tomorrow, but I would imagine that whatever we're doing tomorrow is what I'll be doing.

Okaybye....

S

p.s.- Most of Africa is MANY years behind us in many ways... evidently they still haven't heard about two-ply toilet paper yet... when I come back, I'll open their eyes...

::GASP!!::

Wednesday

Hmmmm... what can be said of today?

I didn't really sleep last night. My leg hurt so badly... some of the worst pain I've ever felt. It's also quite swollen. No matter how I laid in the bed, I just couldn't get comfortable. So needless-to-say, I'm pretty tired. My leg hurts, and evidently when I had my right leg twisted up beneath me, I hurt my ankle somehow but didn't feel it until 3am.

Steve and Dougie B seem to think that I may have fractured my leg.

Not that I know anything about medicine, or the human body, but I doubt that it's fractured. I think it's just really bruised.

Lucky for me, we are taking a boy from the slums to a Dr. tomorrow to look at his leg. Evidently he broke it a little while back, but couldn't get it looked at, so he just had to "cast" it himself. Well, the bone seems to have healed, but there is this massive, oozing inflammation that he's had for a couple months. He showed it to us and we knew we had to get it taken care of, or he'd lose his leg!

Dougie B evidently has a contact with CURE and helped them to build a hospital in Cambodia, and the guy running CURE was all "If you ever need ANYTHING let me know!"

So Dougie B sent him an e-mail to get advice. The guy responded saying that there is a CURE hospital not too far from Nairobi, and to bring the boy in Thursday morning. How's that for God working quickly in this boy's (and ours) life!

While we're there with him, I'm going to have the Dr. just check my leg out and make sure that it's nothing serious.

Anyway...

We had a meeting at 10am with a company called Gitithia. Gitithia does micro-lending. This meeting was very long, and on account of it being in a office with no electricity, I couldn't film at all due to lack of light.

After that, we had a meeting at 1pm with C.H.E.S.S. (Christian Entrepreneurs Sacco, I don't really know what it means, nor do I know how they got "chess" out of it...) C.H.E.S.S. is a micro -lending company also. Again, very long and very boring. The light was better here... but at this point there was only 3 people in the meeting and the room looked like crap.. so I didn't film it.

Hmmm... back to the guesthouse to drop Martin off. Martin is from Partners Worldwide, yet another micro-lending firm.

Off to Trattoria for lunch with Dougie B. They were very busy and slow... this made Dougie B mad >: [ So today, for the first time, the waiter was not tipped ::gasp!::

Kinda funny really...

Back to the guesthouse to catch up on some writing, hoping that the Internet was up to send a couple e-mails and post on the blog... no luck... but it's only 6:30pm here (11:30am there) so maybe there's still hope for the net!

I love you guys... and so does Africa...

How about everyone I know move to Africa with me? That way I could stay here and still have all my friends and family?

S

p.s. today sucked, okaybye.

Should I take this as a sign?

Tuesday

We had a few things planned for today, however one of the appointments was postponed for a day. We were going to take the day off to see the city on Wednesday, but because of the postponing, we just decided to push everything back a day and do our site-seeing today.

I wasn't sure what that was going to look like, or what we were going to do. We decided to start off with a drive through town, headed to the world famous "Giraffe Centre". The Giraffe Centre was established in by some British guy who wanted to save the endangered Giraffe population in Kenya.

It was a neat place. They had a really knowledgeable staff, a clean place, and Giraffeses. Samuel lead us on this tour.



Samuel with a Giraffe's jaw...



Samuel with a Giraffe's leg. Allegedly a kick from a Giraffe can instantly kill a lion.



I kept putting the food pellets in front of my camera lens to try to get them to out it off of the lens... no luck.

On our way out, I ran into a group of tortoises... I gave them all names... but I already forgot 'em.

Also, we learned that occasionally warthogs come from the area to eat the food there, but are definitely unwanted guests at the centre. Evidently their not easy to find there at the centre. Only the lucky few get to see them... booyah:



We left there to the "Birds Paradise Shop" near Karin, where the movie "Out of Africa" was filmed to check out a Maasi owned souvenir shop. Things here are more expensive than I thought they would be, but still relatively cheap.

As we pulled up, two Maasi Warriors jumped in front of our truck. "Freakin' A!" I thought "I'm gonna get killed by two small Maasi! How lame! I'm supposed to go out BIG!" I continued..

Evidently I was right... I am to go out big, since the Maasi just wanted to do their mating dance for us. I'm not sure why, as we're all dudes... what a fruity tribe!

Anywhose... the Maasi traditionally stand in a line and jump as high as they can, which is actually VERY high. Traditionally, this is how the women pick the men to marry. Whoever jumps the highest gets the wife. Good thing we don't have to do that here... I would've NEVER got Laura then!

I dipped inside to check things out. They had a TON of awesome stuff... I found so much stuff that I wanted to get for everyone... but sadly couldn't really afford anything. I picked up a special prize for my sweet babe and headed back outside.

Steve and Dougie B were out talking with the warriors and such outside. I wanted to take more pictures possibly some video... Cost me 500 Kshs, but I finally got the pictures and video of the Maasi that I wanted to get!





From there, we headed to the Safari Walk... it's like going on a safari, except it's all enclosed in a park and you walk around it. So really it's like "Jurassic Park" but without the cars, dinosaurs, and Samuel L. Jackson. This place was GREAT! The weather was just perfect for our adventure! This will be a place that I take Laura for sure!

So, we were met by Salome, a student in Kenya who spends her summer break volunteering at the Safari Walk. This girl was awesome! Very sweet girl who was very knowledgeable and put up with my non-sense the whole time.



We started by checking out the Pygmy Hippos, some monkeys, zebra, ostrich and white rhino. It's weird, most of these I could reach out an touch. Very close up... very fun!

They have a leopard there, but it was way up in a tree, and I couldn't get close enough with either camera. Shucks.

We moved on to the lions... two females and a male. One was named Nala... I told them they were crooks and owed Disney some money... they didn't get it. We next saw some of the natural habitats... and in one spot, there were baboons! They evidently come from Nairobi National Park to the watering whole in the Walk... I couldn't get stills of the mother baboon with her baby, but I was able to get it on film. I'll have to show you sometime.

I saw this incredible spot of landscape that I thought would be AWESOME on the video so I went straight away to get it!

Now something rather expected happened next.

See, Salome was awesome! Not just as a tour guide, but as someone that was able to point out all of the weak, cracked boards along the way... well... she missed one... I found it.

As I stepped to take the film, I heard a loud crack and the next thing I knew, I was in INCREDIBLE pain! My left leg felt as if it was on fire! My leg was through the wood all the way up to my groinal region, and my right leg was twisted up under my body. Surprisingly, I was more worried about my flip-flop falling off than I was about whether or not I was injured!

I pulled myself up out of the whole, and struggled to stand up. Man, was I in pain!

This wouldn't have been quite so bad, if it weren't for the fact that the big long walk in Kibera hadn't made my right leg so sore! Now I could barely walk!

I made my way to a bench and sat for a minute... to relax for a moment. I looked down and there was a small amount of blood dripping down my leg... merely a flesh wound. Salome was so upset and just couldn't stop apologizing. "Hakuna Matata!" I exclaimed... No worries!

It took me a few minutes to get back onto my feet, but I eventually did. I had to take a picture of the whole that got me good in Africa.



We (painfully) finished the tour with some other animals that I didn't care so much about... and headed out.

We drove to downtown Nairobi for the first time. INSANE!! So many people and police and administrative police... lots of guns... cars... crazy!!

We spent some time there, just driving around seeing the sites down town. There were some really HUGE buildings there... this is where the rich people work.

It was getting late and we were all starved, so off we went to "Saim-Thai" for some Thai food. I had never eaten Thai food before. Dougie B said it was just like Chinese... I'm not sure what Chinese food he's been eating.. but it's not the same as me for sure!

I ordered a Lamb stir-fry, extra-hot.. OUT -OF-THIS-WORLD!! It was so good. I've got to find a Thai place when I get home! There was an escalator going up to the restaurant, however only stairs going back down... I couldn't seem to get either leg to work as I headed down them...

Back home we went to check the mail and go to sleep. So yeah... going to bed.

I can't wait to snuggle youse guyses sometimes one time!!

Amani,
S

Thursday, July 26, 2007

...completely unrecognizable as French toast...

Monday

Today started off as usual: wake up at 7am, breakfast at 8, picked-up at 9am.

They had French toast in the restaurant this morning. As far as French toast goes, it was the worst that I've ever had... completely unrecognizable as French toast. They would've done better if they'd told me that it was some traditional African dish... because it tasted AMAZING... just nothing like French toast. Very similar to the Fettucine Alfredo at Trattoria.

Dougie B, as usual, had toast. He's so scared of African food that he wont even eat at the guesthouse. Just toast and jelly. Luckily for him, I don't have the heart to tell him where the jelly comes from....

ANYWAY... Steve was right on time, as always, ready for another exciting day in the Kibera slum.

Today was probably the best day there. The sun was shining, so it wasn't as cold. Plus it was bright outside... gives the village an entirely different look and feel!

As we drove through the street, headed toward the NCOC, I didn't feel well... not like a 'not feel well' sick, but something different. I kept feeling that something big was about to happen. Naturally I assumed that since we chose not to bring escorts today, that today was gonna be the day I proverbially bit the proverbial dust by the hand of an American-hating Kiberan.

Obviously, I didn't die... Good times.

Something pretty huge did happen though... I'll explain more later.

We met Amos at the NCOC to watch the kids at the NCOC Academy for a moment before heading to see Pastor Jane at "Wings of Life Gospel Center" to film their school.



Again these pictures simply do no justice to what it's like in this school. It's partitioned into 3 sections. The first section, just slightly bigger than 10'x10' housed 30 kids... the next section was just slightly bigger than the first, housing 60 kids!!! The last section defied the laws of physics... NINETY orphans in a room no bigger than 10'x15'!





As we walked into the room, I heard a couple kids shout "ESlim! ESlim!" soon after the rest of the school did, although I'm sure that the teachers were not too happy about it!





I got a ton of film in there, but it was very hard on account of there being no lights.. just a couple "windows." Pastor Jane then took me to their 'kitchen', "Huh." I accidentally let out...

One room littered with tables and "spare parts" was the kitchen. No electricity, just two small fire pits to cook food in. It just didn't make sense!



From there we headed back to the NCOC to have a pastors meeting with all of the pastors in Kibera. They work very closely together to reach every man, woman and child in Kibera. Perhaps we can learn a lesson from them...

Just after that, the feeding program began. The feeding program was set-up about a year ago by Help the Least of These through the NCOC. They of course feed the children in the Academy, but they also feed other kids in the community. Like this boy, Moses:





It is a very good thing that they are doing. Most, if not all of these kids will only get one meal, the meal that they receive at school. And of course, they go hungry Saturday and Sunday! The looks on the faces of these kids was astonishing. Belly's full, healthy, happy... it was beautiful. It was in this time that God started to do the huge thing that I spoke of earlier.

I just looked at Moses (above) wearing a ratty, tattered, torn, dingy, smelly, filthy, nasty (should I keep going?) 101 Dalmations Sweater, with dirt and crap (literally) all over his face and hands. I watched as he filled his spoon so full of food that he couldn't fit it in his mouth. He went to eat it and of course most of it spilled down his clothes onto the floor. He then licked the food off of his clothes, and picked the rice and beans up off the floor and preceded to eat that as well.



How could this child be THAT hungry!

He had a cup of water sitting next to him. He would take a sip and smile at me. I boy of very few words, he only spoke really when I spoke to him. "Jinlako ni nani?" (What is your name?) I said to him... "Jinlango Moses." he replied. "Do you know what's on your sweater?" I asked... "Mbwa!" he replied. "Ndio, (yes)" I responded back "but do you know who they are? They're from 101 Dalmations!"

He looked so confused. He obviously had never seen it.

I looked at his legs.. they were so bruised and scarred. Then down to his feet. He wore a pair of torn-up Chuck Taylor's, with a pieces of yarn for laces. They were about 2 sizes too small and had the soles falling right off of them.





I watched as he just sat there. Swinging his legs back and forth. Filling his mouth to overflowing with food. Swinging his legs back and forth. Filling his mouth again. Swinging his legs back and forth. Drinking from his cup and smiling at me.

I watched as I saw the face of God in a 9 year old boy with torn clothes and tiny Chuck Taylor's. Suddenly I was unable to see. It was as if the whole world vanished behind my tears. I cried. I wept.

What did this boy have to be happy about? Both of his parents are dead. He has no home, no food, and is HIV Positive. He's never seen the world outside of Kibera, and truly has NO future. How could he possibly be happy?

What did he have!!

God.

He has faith in God.

I cried even harder. What do I have to NOT be happy about? My family is alive. I have a home, food, and am quite healthy. I've seen the world outside of the slums and have a job with a promising future.

What didn't I have!!

God.

I had no faith in God.

Despite never being hungry, despite being able to pay bills, despite being in love with an AMAZING woman, despite having a family, despite having a punk-rock dog, despite having EVERYTHING in the world, I was still unhappy.

I started to pray to God, for the first time in a while. I mean I started to really pray.

It seemed in that instant that my life had suddenly turned around. Like it did a couple years ago. "Did it really have to resort to this?" I couldn't help but think.

Evidently so. All of the educated people I know, all the wise people I know, all the Pastors that I know could have never taught me what this little boy did. Are they all missing something too?

I've been trying to keep myself from saying that I want to live here. Because sadly, I do. To be quite honest, if Laura was here with me, I'd never go back.

It's easy to talk about how bad the living conditions are here, but what I have neglected to mention was just how present God is here. He is everywhere... moving.. stirring... ready to take over this nation. I want to be in that.

What will I have to do to have that back in America? As I thought this, the words on this blog finally rang true "One man's journey... to change the world." How does one change the world?

I don't know.

But I think it goes something like this: I need to put God above EVERYTHING that I do. Above Laura, my family, my friends and my job. But as I make sure that He is above all those, I need to make sure that God is IN those. I need to make sure that when people see me... no matter how torn or tattered I may be... they see the face of God.

What does that look like for me? I'm not sure. I will strive to work hard on this. But I can't do it alone. I think that I've proved over and over again that I can't do it. I'm not asking for people to do it for me... I'm asking for accountability. I've asked for the this many times from many REALLY close friends over the last 6 months. I've not received it. This will need to change.

I need to truly chase after and fight for the hearts of every man, woman and child in my area. Because as I do this, hopefully God will transform those lives as well. This guy reaches that guy, this woman reaches that woman, this boy reaches that boy, this girl reaches that girl and suddenly the world is changed. The whole world takes care of the widow and the orphan. The whole world becomes equal. The whole world rejoices and praises God, the only one worthy of praise. My journey complete?

I pray that I will one day see my journey complete... highly unlikely though in my lifetime.

Will it happen?

I think of a world not too long ago, where only 12 young men had a relationship with a guy named Jesus. I think of how they were just like me: young, stupid and weak. Yet they decided to answer a call, live a life reflective of Jesus, and reach everyone they could. People thought they were crazy, they thought they were wasting their time. But as they reached people, those people reached out... This guy reaches that guy, this woman reaches that woman, this boy reaches that boy, this girl reaches that girl and suddenly the world is changed.

I, myself, am I byproduct of their will and determination. Who's next?

Anyway... I've strayed from the story...

After sitting with the Moses, the children were ready to put on a 'show' for us. They got on the stage and said their ABC's, counted for us, sang songs (in English), and just had a good time preforming for us.

Cute... very cute...

I interviewed a couple kids from the soccer league, and then let this rap group spit "freestyle" on camera. Evidently they think that if you're video taped, you can make it in America. Funny. I've been video taped THOUSANDS of times... what does that make me?



I then sat with Nicholas, the church guitar player, to teach him about 'keys'. He only knew of one, 'C', and hey played it in EVERY song, regardless of what key the keyboard player was playing. By the end of the hour he understood it and was able to play right away with the key player. Fantastic!

We were leaving Kibera now... probably for the rest of the trip. They all knew we were leaving for a long time.

Three days in Kibera, the most beautiful place on earth.

I wish I had spent more time there. I wish that I had made and impact on the village. I started to tear up. I wanted to do more! I wanted to touch the lives of the people there.

"ESlim! ESlim! Mwebamba! Mwebamba!" I heard from behind me. I turned around and here runs a handful of orphans... STRAIGHT FOR ME! They hit me with such a force that I instantly fell to the ground. They jumped on me hugging every part of my body from every possible angle! "I love you! I love you! I love you!" they rang out in unison, in the style of their famous "How are you! chants.

Had I underestimated myself? More importantly, had I underestimated God?

I fought the fiffers off of me and headed down the way and ran into Dickens who grabbed my hand pull me in and said "I want do a collab wit you!" haha...

I walked passed a shop, and a woman yells: "Mwebamba!!!" I turn around to see this cute young girl running a vegetable stand. "You shake my hand?" she says. "I'll do better," I reply "come here!" I rapped my arms around the girl and squeezed here tightly. She immediately jumped around.. excited... she got to HUG the Mwebamba!

God is good.

S